Have you ever thought of how your eulogy will read on that last day? Creepy?…..I know. But come to think of it: If you fast track your life to very old age a day will come when you will have to think about it. Some people have gone the extra mile to write their eulogies and burial programs when they were convinced that their last days were approaching.

Think about it now. When that day comes when you or someone else will write it what do you think will stand out. What do you think you will regret based on how far you have come and how far you are planning to go? What will make you so happy that you did it and that it actually featured in your eulogy. What will make you so happy that you experienced it even if they do not write it; but you felt it and maybe talked about it.

These may sound like difficult questions. Questions that we may want not to think about. But the reality is, we will all get there. Like someone asked, If you knew you will die tomorrow would you still wake up today and do what you had planned to do? Is there something that you would do differently? Why are you not doing it now?

I have found these to be very useful questions to realizing what really matters to you and to get your genuine definition of success. We have been conditioned to live life in a certain way based on some set standards. If we question those standards, we realize that they are scripts handed to us by family, friends, society, pressure of circumstances, childhood experiences and training. They then rise due to our deep vulnerabilities, our dependency on others, our need for love, acceptance, belonging, sense of importance/worth and a feeling that we matter.

Every time someone tells me they want to discover their purpose; I wonder if they are willing to go all the way. What if they realize that they have been living someone else script all along? We endeavor to know our purpose because we have an empty space in our soul that we want to fill. What we may not think through is we have been climbing the ladder yes but the ladder may have been leaning on the wrong wall all along?

Are you committed to pick your ladder, place it on the right wall and start climbing all over again? You may have done quite a bit of climbing; gone to school, got a good job, raised a good family, made good friends and invested wisely. You may however need to undo quite a bit of that, unlearn and learn for you to follow your new definition of success. Finding your purpose is one thing, committing to go all the way is another thing. However, if you are lucky you could find opportunities to incorporate purpose in your current script without undoing everything.

What unique item or experience do you want to add to your eulogy? What would make your face glow with joy on your last days knowing that you did it? What would cause you the most regret on your last day knowing you did not have the courage to chase it? “When you get old you are supposed to sit on your favorite rocking chair and tell the story of your life but when you are your age you are supposed to make sure that the story will be good to tell” Lisa Nichols

One thing that bothers me is why they tell one to ‘Rest in peace’ on that day. I may not speak for the dead but does it mean that we never live in peace? I intend and chose to live in peace everyday so that RIP will not be my defining letters on that day. I want letters like SLHL; She Lived Her Life. Because I will have utilized every bit of my potential to the bone and touched as many lives as I could. And that’s my definition of success.

“Once you learn how to die, you learn how to live” Tuesdays with Morrie